Last Year in Review

I don't even know where to start or how to start. My life this past year has been a whirlwind of change and growth. So I guess I'll just do a synopsis of each month and then reflect upon my theme and goals for the past year and ultimately my successes and failures (or lack of completion for a better term).

January

Completed a rotation at UVA in Peds with Marcia Buck. Waited to hear back from residency programs and started scheduling interviews.

February

Trips all over for residency interviews: Seattle, Boise, California, Virginia, and Texas. Started my second to last rotation at Buford road. Lots of rock climbing with Jordan.

March

Final rotation in Shiprock, NM. Which included tons of trips to the four-corners region. Saw the grand canyon, mesa verde, santa fe, flagstaff, and so much more! Made the drive from NM to VA by myself in 2 days (and I am not sure if I was totally crazy or amazing). Oh yeah and I celebrated turning 26...if you can celebrate that...

April

Organized everything for my boards. Started studying. And spent time with the people I loved in VA. Lots of wonderful walks with Sandy and tons of conversations with Jessica.

May

Graduated from pharmacy school. Proudest moment of my life. So very grateful for my family and friends who made the moment spectacular.

June

Took my boards and passed! Had some crazy moments with Scott Backus in Newport News. Started to say goodbye to old friends.

July

Packed up my home in VA. Spent as much time as possible with my favorite people. Saw the final Harry Potter at midnight and then drove with Stephy and PapaBear to Texas. (After of course staying up all night talking to my Best Friend Jessica. And doing everything I could to hold onto the moments we had left.)

August

Suffered from heat exhaustion every day in Texas. Met my co-residents and office mates. Arianne came to visit me! Lots of adventures.

September

Research. Visit with Uncle Mike. More Texas heat. Lindsay and Bobby moved in for a bit.

October-November

Complete blur. Internal Medicine rotation for 2 months: 4am to 10pm. Texas is still hot. Crazy. Awesome Halloween party. Trip to PapaBear's for Thanksgiving (what a wonderful break and amazing time-I am so very grateful for my PapaBear)

December

New Orleans to present my research! Finished out my first six months as a resident! Spent Christmas in Texas-finally getting cooler.

The move to Texas was huge for me. I wish that I could write and talk about how wonderful it has been-but that would be a stretch. Its getting better-don't get me wrong. But it really is hard to uproot your life, to leave the ones you love, and start over again. Texas has brought a lot of growth in itself, a lot of depending on the Lord, and I am really excited for the new year to focus on my new theme and learn to love texas.

But before we get to all of that, last year's theme and goals:

My theme was based around the quote: "In order to become what we want to be, we have to consistently be what we want to become."

Make the Choice to simplify my life

This has been an ongoing process. With the move to Texas I have started to declutter my life and am continuing to work on that. Luckily I haven't had a lot of extra money, so I haven't been able to spend it on needless things. I've not been excellent on focusing on the key relationships in my life, but I have done a lot better then normally. I really focused on seeking out Christ in the Book of Mormon and through that process, came to understand him better-to understand the better parts of me. So overall, I give this a check!

Make the choice to act and not be acted upon

This theme was a major plus from January through August. And then I lost my footing a little. I became overwhelmed with the fear that I had made the wrong choice in moving to Texas, that I had misunderstood revelation. However, after a few weeks of floundering, I found my footholds again and really chose to not be acted upon. So I will give this a check!

Make the choice to be healthy

A perpetual struggle. However, I ran some races (thanks to Jessica Donbrosky!) and I finally got a gym membership! I was going to classes every day for a week, but then Christmas break came and I got lazy. So overall, no check! But there is always next year.

Make the choice to be productive

This one is hard to write, especially after the last week where I have not done a great job. However, I think overall I have done a really good job at focusing on things and accomplishing them. There is still tons of improvement to be done, but I managed to complete residency applications, to study for my boards, to move to Texas, to complete my courses and research project, to teach students, and to complete internal medicine! Thus, CHECK!

3/4 checks! Not bad. Good year. Improvements to be made, but there will always be improvements. So here is to next year-and the theme that is to come.

Thanksgiving is fast approaching

So what better way to get in the mood, then listing my 5 favorite foods! (haha, that rhyming is just to awesome to change)

5.

Jessica Donbrosky's Oatmeal Cookies with Cinnamon Chips

4.

Summer squash casserole

3.

Grandma's Green Bean Casserole

2.

Jessica Donbrosky's Honey Bun Cake

(she makes the list twice cause her desserts did me in all the time!)

1.

Lemon Bars

(I do believe I have a problem-3/5 of my favorite foods are desserts. OY VEY.)

I've been things and I have seen places.

“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.”

6. Oceanside, CA

I love this place. There are so many memories, so much growth, and substantial peace that I find every time I find myself there. Nothing is better for me then a walk on the beach, the sand between my toes; a shake from Rudy's on the pier; a sunset over the water; and a trip to Chandler's for a glass bulb in memory of Grandma.

5. Island Park

I love my mountains. I love swimming at buttercream with my cousins. I love horseshoe tournaments and playing cards all day long. I love homemade donuts and sleeping on the hard ground. I love waking up and warming up by the campfire. I love fishing and hiking. I love Island Park.

4. Virginia

My home. I love fall and the changing of the leaves. I love the history and culture. I love my village-those who raised me.

3. Grandma's House

Who doesn't love grandma's house?! Hugs and kisses. Delicious food. And time with the best little woman in the world.

2. Italy/Spain/Greece

Best trip of my life.

1. The Temple

Doesn't matter where it is located, it will always be my favorite place on earth.

7 wants: Fantasy or Reality?!

“I've learned that everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.”

7. This dumb class to be over.

No for reals. I strongly dislike my Tuesday afternoon class. I come and do nothing related to the class. Instead I play on my computer, work on other assignments, or read a book. (I finished the Hunger Games in this class...)

6. A second job.

Cause then maybe I can afford to go home for Christmas and not stress at the end of every month and pay people back and all that jazz. (I have a phone interview tomorrow...fingers crossed!)

5. To be debt free.

See number 6.

4. A horse farm.

Horses make me ridiculously happy. Why would I not want a horse farm?

3. To run a marathon, without actually running.

I said fantasy/reality. Its my want list. Stop judging me.

2. To be better at bearing my testimony outside of church.

Its a good want.

1. To get married (SOMEDAY).

Well...I do....

200?!! Really?!! 200!!!

So I'm feeling a lot of pressure to make this post spectacular because it is my 200th post on this blog! This blog has been an outlet for my frustrations, for my sadness, my testimony, and ultimately my journeys over the last few years.

So for this post I just want to say that I am very grateful for so very much today. I had a very rough Sunday-the dam of emotions that I have been shoving down inside for over 3 months finally blew and I'm pretty sure I spent more time crying then I did anything else. But it was so good for me-I needed it more then I knew.

Then today, I set out with the intention to just have a decent day. And of course, I got so much more-another tender mercy of the Lord.

I am so, so very grateful for the love my Father in Heaven has for me. I am grateful that it gives me purpose and strength. I am grateful that it heals my wounds and builds me up. I am so very grateful for Him and all He does.

The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself...

That being said, I'm pretty sure I have more then 8 fears...but I'll list my biggest ones!

#8:

Heights. Oh yea. I know I'm a rock-climber. But have you seen me climb with just anyone?! No. You can chalk that one up to Jessica Voqui (I still love you) since she dropped me when we were climbing once! Yeah-talk about making your fear worse.

#7:

Going blind. It runs in my family and I'd rather die before I lost my sight. (I'm sure if it happens, I'll survive-but I'd rather not find out)

#6, #5, #4:

Failure. Disappointing people. Not being good enough. (They all go together-and they circle my brain constantly)

#3:

Losing my two remaining Grandparents. I know it's inevitable-but I'm hoping they can stick around til I get married and have a few kids and maybe even a few grandkids. I'm ridiculously close to my Papabear and my Gamma is my best friend. It was hard enough losing my Grandpa Ron and my Grandma June. I can't imagine going through that all over again.

#2:

Scary movies. I know its ironic. But I hate them and I'm afraid of them-to the point that I refuse to even read what they are about.

#1:

Hobo spiders. Not all spiders. Just those nasty Hobo spiders that sneak into your basement, climb up your bathroom walls, and chase you when you find one. (Uncle Mike-you are still on the crap list for letting one jump on me when you were trying to feed Petey. *SHIVER*)

9?! 9?! I hate multiples of 3!!!

Better get this one over quick!!!

"A heart full of love, A heart full of song."

#9:

Orin and Bryant told me that I have way to many of them. But I don't care! I can't get enough of books. And I don't want a kindle, because I love to touch my books, I like to smell them, and I write all over them. In short, I love books.

#8:

I love the temple. When I was younger, I thought that I loved only the Idaho Falls temple, but then I feel in love with the Washington DC temple, and now I love the San Antonio temple. So I've learned its not the location, but the actual temple.

#7:

I think its important to know that along with temples, I absolutely love the Gospel and being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (in sense, a mormon). With all the recent challenges and political comments recently, I just want it to be known that I am Christian, that I believe in Jesus Christ and that I know Joseph Smith was a prophet of God. My testimony is surrounded by love for the gospel and love surrounds me. =)

#6:

Oh yea. Me and sleep-BFF's for life. Seriously. Give me a soft blanket, some pillows, and a bed and I'll snuggle down. I nap like a champ. And when I say nap, I really mean I sleep for 2-3 hours at a time. I love sleep. And I don't get enough of it!

#5

I love my 3 best friends. I have been so lucky to find 3 very different people, who each make my life so much better. My life-time best friend, Heather Anne. My college best friend, Stephanie K. And my adult best friend, Jessica TB. There are many other important people in my life, great friends who have impacted me and I love them all-but these three girls I love more then words can describe. Their friendships have changed my life for the better and despite how things may change, they will always be a part of my life.

#4:

My family is also another love of mine. Although they drive me crazy, they also support me and their encouragement makes me work harder (especially when I feel like throwing in the towel). I'm grateful for such a large family-who will drive 28+ hours to come see me, who will spend an entire day cooking for me, or who will let me call and rant at all hours of the day. My family is far from perfect, but I would not trade them for the world. I love them fiercely and completely.

#3:

There is a special place in my heart for this particular family member. My PapaBear is my hero. I always struggled with feeling so different and then I realized, I'm not different. I take after my grandfather-a person who defeated all odds and became something amazing. Our relationship is something that is very important to me and something I love.

#2:

I love musicals. My favorites are Les Miserables, Wicked, and Rent. At times, I wish my life were an actual musical.

#1:

My number one love is my scriptures. My Gamma got me my scriptures for Christmas when I was 15. They were the first set I had ever had and they had my name on them. Now, they are old and full of my markings. They show the growth of my testimony and my knowledge of God. They also show the struggles I faced and how I overcame them and stayed close to my Father in Heaven. They are the most precious thing I own and I love them so very much.