Changes of Attitude

I am ridiculously homesick. Maybe its the cabin fever talking (we have been cooped up in a hotel room for two days due to the mass amounts of snow Flagstaff received) or maybe its cause difficult topics came up today-but I just want to be home.

I miss the ability to just talk to my roommate. I miss my cat. I miss my girlfriends. I miss hugs from Jordan that fix everything. I'm just homesick.

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I decided to turn it around today-to have a better attitude then I did yesterday. And for the most part I had fun. Until tonight, when Holly and Nick took their joking a little to far and my cracked emotions burst through EVERYTHING. I sat in the hotel bathroom with a cold towel-trying not to sob to loudly. It was absolutely embarrassing to know that they knew I was crying.

But as always, Heavenly Father sent a tender mercy. A phone call that I have desperately wanted since I left Virginia, finally came-tonight-when I needed it most of all. And now in the aftermath of all those tears and then that call-I realize why this trip has been so hard on me. I've missed church every Sunday, I missed conference because we were traveling, I've done okay with my scripture reading (but just okay-and definitely not daily). I am really really grateful, that despite all my failures to recognize my Father in Heaven-my Heavenly Father still recognizes me and pours out his love upon me just when I need it most. I'm grateful for a phone call that lifted my sorrows and helped me to laugh. I'm also grateful that the phone call helped me see some of my selfishness and put other people's lives into perspective.

9 days until I leave for HOME. 9 days of better and best choices for the rest of this trip.