Well I Never Seem to do it like Anybody Else

Have you ever had one of those moments in life where you are driving down the road and you think to yourself, "How is it that this song fits me so perfectly?" I'm a big fan of music. I always have been; especially since I do not see myself to be very eloquent with words. I've always believed that music could tell my story for me and today, "The Long Way Around" fit perfectly.

I wanted to bear my testimony yesterday, because I received a beautiful witness of Heavenly Father's love for me personally on Saturday. I never got out of my seat, but my heart was screaming my testimony right out of my chest. I've been struggling for quite some time now and the struggles only keep getting harder. The Brow informed me that this struggle, this mountain is probably one that will take a while to climb (a year or longer if you want the exact words). And I know that this is one of the most honest statements that she has ever given me.

I've let the adversary into my thoughts and I've let him weigh me down with fear and with insecurities and with so much more. And on Saturday, I considered not going to the temple because I wasn't sure that I could enter those sacred walls with my heart so heavy. However, the Brow convinced me otherwise and I am so glad she did, because it was one of the most significant moments in my life.

I've learned about the Lord's love for me individually over my life, I've never struggled with the fact that He has always been there supporting me. My struggle has always been with myself. With the fact that I am imperfect, that I am stubborn, that I insist upon "taking the long way around." I struggle with the fact that I think I am smarter or stronger then I really am, I struggle with me. But sitting there inside those hallowed walls, for a small moment, I felt the love in part that my Heavenly Father has for me. That warmth and comfort of his love was a testament to me. It was a heavenly reminder that Heavenly Father already knew that I would "take my time and take the long way around."

I'll never be perfect. And the Brow is right, this latest struggle is going to take longer then I want it to because I'm going to have to look hard at myself and cut out more then I might like-but in the end, it's the only way to bring peace and joy into my life.

"I've been long time gone now, but I've always found my way somehow, by taking the long way around. I'm getting it back on the road, but I'm taking the long way, taking the long way around. I guess I could have made it easier on myself, but I could not follow. I never seem to do it like anyone else...I can still be found taking the long way around."